


Déjà rêvé

by RunaLiore



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power
Genre: Angst, Catradora in Mutual Denial of their Mutual Pining, Chaptered, Dreamsharing, F/F, Kissing, Mutual Pining, Post Season 1
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-19
Updated: 2019-05-12
Packaged: 2019-08-25 18:34:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 14,253
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16666057
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RunaLiore/pseuds/RunaLiore
Summary: The battle of Brightmoon left Adora injured and exhausted, in more ways than one. With the immediate threat of Horde invasion gone and the Alliance back on track, the days that followed the battle were full of strategy meetings, negotiations, palace banquets, and rebellion training. Adora didn't want to miss any of it, especially since everyone looked to She-Ra as a symbol of hope... but lately, she's been so dead on her feet that she can barely focus for more than an hour at a time.When Netossa, Spinnerella, and Queen Angella notice Adora's exhaustion, they send her back to her chambers to rest for the remainder of the day. Adora agrees, reluctantly, and she falls asleep almost the instant she returns to her room. While she sleeps, however, she dreams of the Fright Zone barracks where she trained as a cadet... and of Catra.





	1. Dream I: Barracks

**Author's Note:**

> Hi Everyone!
> 
> So this fic won't be terribly long but I'm splitting it into three chapter, with each chapter having a different dreamsharing sequence. The kissing happens in the third one, but I'll try to have that out by the end of this week. This is set post-season 1 so minor spoilers for episode 13. Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoy!
> 
> I also want to thank satelliteinasupernova for all of her help beta reading this!

The doors to the conference chamber swung open and a dozen princesses rushed out into the halls of Brightmoon Palace, half of them chatting as they walked while the other half sprinted toward their next meeting. Behind all of them, Adora stumbled across the threshold and yawned.

“Ok, that’s three meetings down. Six to go,” She nodded and clenched her fist, “You can do this Adora, you can–” She yawned again and nearly fell against the wall.

“You can do this, come on. I can rest… tonight.”

She blinked and rubbed the sleep from her eyes, though she felt more like she’d just smudged the sleep all over her face. A sharp sparkle caught her attention from across the hall and she squinted to watch it.

“Oh, Glimmer!” Adora waved and walked down the hall toward the trail of sparkles Glimmer left behind, but by the time she started moving Glimmer was already there beside her. Adora wasn’t sure if she’d teleported or if she was just so exhausted she didn’t see her moving.

“Adora, hey!” Glimmer hugged her quickly and then teleported away, “Sorry I’ve gotta run and meet Frosta’s entourage, I’ll see you back at dinner tonight! Tell Bow ‘hi’ from me if you see him!”

“Oh, yeah,” Adora’s lips stretched into a thin smile and she waved as Glimmer teleported away, “Will do.”

With Glimmer gone, Adora was left alone in the corridor as she wracked her brain trying to remember where the next meeting was supposed to be held. At some point, she stopped to think and it may have taken two or ten or maybe even twenty minutes for her to regain her focus. She tried to pick up her feet and hurry to the next hall over, hoping she could catch a guard who could help her figure out where her next meeting was taking place, but her legs felt so heavy they were almost numb. She finally managed to get into a steady pace when she rounded the corner and slammed right into someone. She felt hands on her shoulders immediately and she shook her head out to see Netossa holding her upright and grimacing.

“Adora! Hey, are you okay?” Netossa loosened her grip a bit and Adora felt herself wobbling. “You look like you haven’t slept in days.”

“What? No,” Adora smiled weakly, “No, I slept, I just–” She yawned, “There’s just a lot to do with strategizing and planning and trying to figure out where the next horde attack will be, and we’ve got so many princesses to bring into the alliance now.”

Beside Netossa, her wife Spinnerella smiled gently and tilted her head. “Is that why we saw the lights in your room almost three hours after midnight last night?”

“Ah,” Adora’s eyes shifted and she laughed awkwardly, “Ahaha, I just couldn’t sleep so I decided to get a headstart on today’s strategy meetings and–”

“Adora!”

Queen Angella called out from a nearby doorway as she hurried over to where Netossa and Spinnerella stood. She looked almost mortified.  Adora wondered if her own face really looked so terrible. Either way, the Queen was staring at her now with more than a little concern.

“Is that true, Adora?” Angella waited impatiently for a reply. Adora took a slow breath.

“I’m fine, I promise. I have to be able to handle at least this much in case the horde attacks again and I can get plenty of rest after dinner!”

“Absolutely not!” Angella’s gaze sharpened. “Adora, you need to rest. I know that we’ve placed a great deal upon your shoulders as of late, but if you’re too exhausted to even stand on your own then you’re in no condition to be strategizing about anything, much less fighting the horde!”

Adora opened her mouth to protest but all that came out was a lopsided yawn. She held a finger up to pause the conversation while the yawn to passed, but Queen Angella shook her head.

“Adora we’re more than capable of covering for you for a single afternoon. I’ll have Glimmer help as well. As for you, I’m going to insist that you head back to your quarters and rest for the remainder of the day.”

“Yeah,” Netossa said, looking at her now with more worry than anything, “I’ve been trying to let go of your shoulders for the last few minutes but every time I almost take my hands away you start to fall.”

“Wait, is that what that weird wobbly feeling was?” Adora blinked and then sighed. It probably didn’t make any sense to argue after all of that, though she still didn’t feel good about taking the rest of the day off.

“Okay,” She said, placing a hand on the wall and holding herself up, “I’ll get some sleep.”

“Please do,” Spinnerella said, “And try to sleep all through the night this time.”

“Ahaha, yeah.” Adora’s shoulders sank and she dragged herself back down the hall and toward her chambers.

It took a lot of energy and restraint for her to resist immediately flopping over the moment she got back into her room. In fact, the only reason she didn’t was because she noticed that she wasn’t alone: along the near wall, two beautiful women wrapped in deep indigo robes were leaning over a black wooden crib, crooning over a small baby with dark skin and a single light tuft of pink hair. As soon as the women saw Adora enter, they looked up and bowed their heads.

“She-Ra, we are sorry, we did not realize you would be returning so soon.”

The other woman raised her head and smiled, her eyes soft and apologetic, “We just needed a place for Princess Somna to rest and every other room on the hall was full.”

“Oh, no, it’s ok!” Adora put on her brightest smile in spite of the exhaustion. “This is great actually, I sleep better when there are people around so you can use my room whenever she needs a nap. Plus, she’s adorable!” Adora’s eyes lit up as she carried herself over to the crib, with some difficulty, and joined them in staring at the child while she slept.

“So this is Princess Somna,” Adora whispered, watching as Somna’s tiny chest rose and fell with a soft coo, “I didn’t realize any of the princesses here were so young. Oh, wait,” She looked up and met the eyes of the two women standing across from her, “That means, you two are Queen Asteria and Queen Nyxia!”

Asteria, the taller of the two women laughed silently and smiled. “Yes,” she whispered, “Princess Somna is our daughter. She usually sleeps well through meetings when we keep court back at home, but I think moving around so much over the past few days has worn her out.”

“Well, you can use my room as long as you’d like,” Adora said, “I’ve been ordered to rest up so I’ll probably be asleep for the next couple hours anyway.”

Asteria and Nyxia bowed their heads again and wished Adora a sound rest, though if they said anything else after that, Adora didn’t hear them. Her head was already feeling groggy and the moment she laid herself down, she fell fast asleep.

 

* * *

 

 

The hiss of steam and the grinding, metallic sound of machinery pulled Adora back to consciousness with a start. She gasped as she sat upright, her heart already racing as she smelled oil on the air and felt cold steel against her hands. She looked around the room twice to make certain, but she barely even needed a glance to know that she was back in her cadet barracks in the Fright Zone. She bolted upright and ran to the middle of the room.

“Wait, why am I here? This is… the barracks, right? I need to… do what again? Oh, right, I need to get to training or I’ll be late and Shadow Weaver will– Wait, no!” Adora smacked her face and squeezed her eyes tight while she took a breath.

“This has to be a dream, right? It’s definitely a dream. No problem,” She nodded to herself, looking around at the desolate room full of plated metal and pipes that snaked across the wall, “Just a dream. Well, at least I know I won’t get in trouble for skipping a training drill.”

She smiled bitterly and stretched her hands out over her head as her eyes wandered over the room, finally settling on Catra’s empty bunk. For reasons she couldn’t exactly explain, she walked over and ran a hand over the thin sheet that passed for Catra’s blanket. Her cot was surprisingly clean and her blankets were barely wrinkled, though that didn’t surprise Adora considering how often Catra slept beside her back when they were both recruits. Near the wall, Adora saw a small doodle of what looked like Catra’s face and next to it, a doodle of Adora’s own face was covered by a row of claw marks. Adora traced her hand over the deep gashes in the metal wall and sighed, and as she did she heard someone walk into the room.

“Alright, I just need to–What!?” Catra stood in the far doorway glowering at Adora, but after a moment she seemed to relax a little, though she never stopped glaring.

“Ugh, why is this happening again? This is the third time this week…” Catra pushed off of the doorframe and the tip of her tail started flicking back and forth. “Why can’t you just leave me alone?”

She started walking across the room, right toward Adora without even blinking. Adora grit her teeth and braced herself for a struggle, but Catra just moved in close and hugged her so tight Adora nearly gasped. She opened her mouth to speak, but then stopped to think.

_Wait, this is a dream, right? I mean obviously, Catra would never do something like this in the real world… at least not the way things are now. But why am I dreaming about this!? This isn’t helping me catch up on sleep!_

Catra groaned and slowly, almost reluctantly pulled herself away, still glowering as she crossed her arms.

“Okay, fine,” She said, “How are you going to torment me today?”

“What?” Adora frowned, “I’m not going to torment you. Catra…” She furrowed her brow and glared at Catra for a moment while Catra glared back. It seemed like they were frozen there staring at one another for hours in the breadth of a second, and then when time finally moved again, Adora just felt drained.

“Catra, I’m sorry…”

“What!?” Catra almost staggered back but Adora wouldn’t break her gaze. Even if this was a dream, she thought, or maybe even _because_ it was a dream, she was going to tell Catra exactly what was on her mind.

“Listen, Catra,” Adora softened her voice, “I feel like everything I’ve done lately has just pushed you further away and closer to Hordak, but I swear even though we’re enemies right now I just… want you with me again.”

“No.” Catra snorted. “No way! You think everything I do is because of you, don’t you!?” she scoffed pointed one claw up at Adora’s face. “I didn’t take down Shadow Weaver and climb up this far in the Horde because you made me do anything, I did it because I realized that you were using me to get ahead, and anyway, _you’re_ the one who left _me_ behind!” She turned aside and then glanced back at Adora through the corner of her eye, her tail drooping low to the ground. “Adora, we could’ve been the ones at the top of the horde together! We could’ve taken Hordak and had everything and done whatever we wanted! But then you just left me when you got a chance to be She-Ra and jump up to the top of the rebellion! And… and–”

Catra faltered, her face pained and her voice cracking. Before Adora could move, she fell against Adora’s chest and buried her face in Adora’s shoulder. She grunted and started mumbling into Adora’s hair.

“Damn it. Yelling at you in a dream just feels pathetic.”

Adora was still stunned. Even in a dream, she never expected Catra to act like this, to just lean against her and hold onto her like she was going to float away. Even though it was a dream, Adora felt like she couldn’t just leave things at that–she held Catra’s shoulders and pushed her back just far enough so that they could look each other in the eye.

“Catra, I swear I never wanted to leave you behind. I still don’t! You can still come with me and join the rebellion and we can still take down Hordak together!”

Catra’s face twisted up in a wry grin and she almost laughed. “Ha, what, so I can be one of your fifty princess lackeys while She-Ra stands up on a pedestal? So I can stalk around the palace while everyone spends weeks glaring at me because I was a horde soldier? Like I haven’t considered how that would go.”

Adora frowned. “That’s not how it would be. The people of–”

“That’s exactly how it would be!” Catra snapped, “I’m not She-Ra and I don’t have some fancy giant sword that instantly makes people trust me! So how would that work, I wonder, when the girl who killed so many of their friends and family shows up and decides to join them? Ugh, you’re always like this…”

“I…” Adora’s voice caught in her throat and Catra’s eyes shifted away. More than anything, Adora felt as if she’d just messed things up even more than they were before.

“Catra, I–”

“That’s enough,” Catra pushed herself away and sighed, “Even if you realize it here it won’t matter. Just go.”

“No,” Adora took a step after her and grabbed Catra’s shoulder, “I won’t go, Catra. I’m not leaving without you this time.”

Catra turned back, her teeth bared and her eyes full of fire as she shouted.

“Just GO!”

 

* * *

 

Everything was dark and quiet, and then gradually the sound of flowing water crossed Adora’s ears. She opened her eyes and sat up at once to look around. She was in her room at the Brightmoon Palace with her skin covered in cold sweat. She remembered her dream in vivid detail, down to each instant and every sensation. When she remembered Catra’s voice, she felt a pang in her chest. Her heart was racing.


	2. Dream II: Whispering Woods

For the next hour, Adora tried and failed to fall asleep again. When the sunrise finally crashed in through her windows, she gave up and rolled out of bed with a weary yawn. After two steps, her jaw dropped and her eyes stretched wide. She whipped her head back to look through the window and nearly screamed.

“It’s morning!? Why didn’t anyone wake me up!”

A happy gurgle greeted her from the side of the room where Queen Nyxia was playing with her daughter and bopping her on the nose. Adora barely took a moment to say ‘morning!’ to them as she ran through the room, stumbling into her boots and bursting into the hall like a stack of saucers falling from a cabinet. She landed on her hands and knees in the hall, brushing herself up and laughing awkwardly as more than a dozen guards and dignitaries watched the commotion. Fortunately, they weren’t the only ones who noticed Adora tumbling into the hall.

“Adora, hey!” Bow jogged up beside her, somehow still looking as bright-eyed and glowing as ever. “You okay?”

“No!” Adora shouted louder than she intended and she lowered her voice immediately, “I mean yes, I’m fine, but Bow, it’s morning! Why didn’t anyone wake me up!?” She bent over and clutched her stomach, “I’m so hungry.” 

“Well, we tried to wake you up last night,” Bow said, “But when Glimmer tried to get you up for dinner you just rolled over and almost backhanded her in the jaw.”

Adora looked aside and her voice fell, “I need to apologize to Glimmer, then. I’m sorry, I didn’t realize I was so out of it.”

“It’s no problem!” Bow grinned and patted Adora’s shoulder as they walked down the hall, “You needed rest and you slept for a really long time, so now you’re back to normal and the Best Friends Squad is back in action. Our first action being breakfast, of course.” 

“Ugh, yeah,” Adora smiled a bit sheepishly as her stomach growled so loud she could almost hear it echo through the hall, “Let’s go find Glimmer and get something to eat.”

 

* * *

 

“Adora!” 

As soon as Adora stepped into the dining hall she heard Glimmer calling out to her from halfway across the room. In a puff of sparkles, Glimmer teleported across the room and hugged Adora and Bow both at once. Adora raised her hands to hug Glimmer back, but the memory of her dream flashed in her mind and she hesitated. Why had she dreamed of Catra hugging her like that? And why did it feel so real?

Glimmer finally let go and hopped back, joining Bow and Adora as they slowly made their way toward the kitchens.

“Hey, are you feeling better?” Bow asked as they wound their way through the dining hall, “You still look kind of rough.”

“Well, no surprise!” Glimmer said, her brow creased from worry, “She’s still got all those wounds from the last battle and it’s not like she’s slowing down to recover.”

“No, I’m okay, I promise,” Adora smiled faintly, “and I feel a lot better, actually. Just incredibly hungry and kind of out of it still. That and I had this weird dream so sleep wasn’t as great as it could have been.”

“Oh yeah, me too!” Bow nodded and his eyes were almost sparkling, “I had this amazing dream where I taught Swift Wind how to use a crossbow and he got really good at it, and then we were flying around shooting arrows at these giant snails and–wait, how did Swift Wind use a crossbow with his hooves?”

“Bow,” Glimmer smiled and put a hand on Bow’s arm, “It probably wasn’t that sort of dream.”

Adora laughed, and she almost meant it too. 

“If we could teach Swift Wind to use a bow he’d probably just use it to break every stable in Etheria.” 

As they waited in line to order from the chefs, Adora felt a knot starting to form in her shoulder. She raised her arm and started to stretch to her side when a flash of pain seared her back. She flinched and lowered her hand, reaching around and touching the scratch marks that Catra left there on her back during the battle for Brightmoon. 

“Adora, what’s wrong?” Glimmer blinked around Adora and studied her back, “Are those cuts  _ still _ not healing all the way?”

“No, it’s fine,” Adora flashed a confident smile, though she worried it might look a bit hollow, “I think my shirt just caught on the scab in a weird way.”

“So Adora, what was your dream about?” Bow looked at her expectantly and Adora’s eyes wandered away across the room.

“Oh, haha... I don’t remember the whole thing,” Her eyes shifted again, “It was something about teaching Swift Wind to use a sword? I think?”

She sounded incredibly unconvincing and judging from the look Glimmer and Bow shot to one another, she hadn’t fooled anyone.

“Okay, well,” Bow said, “Not sure why you’re lying about that but let’s get breakfast.”

“No, I mean,” Adora held her hands up and tried to pantomime a swordfight, “Swift Wind was holding the sword in his mouth right? And then I… yeah okay, it wasn’t about Swift Wind.” Adora shrugged and a crooked smile tugged at her lips, “It was just really weird, that’s all.”

“Adora maybe you should still take it easy,” Glimmer said, her voice soft and reassuring even though Adora still felt kind of bad for needing reassurance. “Maybe you should take a nap this afternoon or get to sleep early tonight. Bow and I can cover for you if you need us to, just say the word.”

“Thanks…” Adora’s uneven smile cracked a bit, “You’re right, maybe I should, if it’s not a problem.”

“You definitely should, and it’s no problem at all,” Bow said with a confident grin, “It’s what the Best Friends Squad is for!”

 

* * *

 

Adora managed to pull herself through the entire day without collapsing and she begrudgingly considered that a triumph. Just an hour after sunset, she wandered back to her room with a small bundle of spare sweet rolls which she intended to eat while she planned for the next day’s meetings. Once again though, as soon as she set foot in her room she felt unbearably drowsy. 

“Wow, what…” Adora shook her head out and set the bread down on a small table. She noticed Queen Asteria napping with Princess Somna among the pillows stacked against the far wall and she smiled at them both before heading over to her bed. Slowly, she took off her boots and let down her hair, and quietly laid down on her side.

Sleep didn’t find her as quickly as it had the night before. For a long, silent while, Adora stared through her window and wondered why she had dreamed of Catra… and why she’d dreamed of Catra doing and saying all of those things. 

_ Well, guilt, for one, _ she thought, frowning slightly,  _ But that’s not completely it… I could probably press Bow and Glimmer and maybe even some of the other princesses to lead another mission into the Fright Zone to bring Catra back, or at least try and convince her. After what happened last time though… no, even if no one got hurt at all, that’s too selfish. It probably wouldn’t work and everyone would be in danger for no reason. Just because I still miss Catra.... _

Adora rolled over onto her back and winced as a dull pain crept across her wounds. She sighed and her head sank back into her pillow like a lump of lead.

_ It’s not that I don’t love my new friends, because I do! Bow and Glimmer are so important to me and all the other princesses I’ve met are amazing, but I just… can’t stop missing Catra. I don’t even know if we’ll ever be on the same side again, but I still miss her. This probably won’t get better anytime soon but I just… Ugh! _

Adora grabbed her pillow and squeezed it against her chest, rolling onto her side and squeezing her eyes shut while she wondered just why the Catra in her dreams held onto her so tightly.

 

* * *

 

The scent of earth and mist filled Adora’s nose and she opened her eyes. The whispering woods surrounded her, but she didn’t recognize any of her surroundings. The sun was setting over the Fright Zone, though it didn’t make sense that she could see it from the middle of the wood, and the glow of the Moonstone shined from Brightmoon far in the opposite direction. The air felt dense, almost heavy like water and it swirled around Adora with every step. Adora only realized she was dreaming when she stepped around a huge, twisting tree and found Catra scratching something into the ground. Her ears twitched as Adora approached and the wind carried the mist around her in dark splotches like bleeding ink. For a moment, Adora forgot herself.

“Catra!”

She took three steps and then paused when Catra turned and hissed. She retracted her claws and lowered her tail when she saw Adora there, and for only a moment her face softened. Then she scowled.

“What!? Ugh,” Catra kicked at the ground, obviously trying to scratch out whatever she was doodling, “When is this going to stop!?”

Adora took another step, though honestly she was still completely lost.

“When will what stop? What are you talking about?”

Catra marched up to her and pointed a finger at her chest, staring her right in the eye. 

“You!” She said, her voice keen and bitter, “When are you going to stop showing up every time I go to sleep!?”

Adora caught herself smiling wryly.

_I could say the same to you. She has a good point though–or wait, no, the Catra in my dream has a good point. I probably need to make sure I don’t confuse her for the real Catra, but even if she’s not real, she’s definitely here… Maybe I just want to talk to her again, since this might be the only way I can._ Adora’s mouth twisted up awkwardly as she thought. _That feels dumb. No matter what I say to the Catra in this dream, nothing’s going to change once I wake up. But then again, I can’t just be here in a dream with Catra and_ ** _not_** _talk to her._

Adora nodded to herself and took a deep breath.

“Hey, Catra–”

“Ok, we’re not doing this tonight.” Catra sneered and marched back across the small clearing, plopping herself down against the massive tree nearby and sitting between the curve of two of its roots.

“You’re just a dream, alright? So just stay over there on your side of the tree until I wake up.” Catra leaned back and crossed her arms, grimacing as she rolled her head away and rested against the tree. She looked annoyed, but also a little uneasy, almost off-balance. When they were younger, Adora would have taken that chance to tease Catra about something. Now, though, she couldn’t think of anything that didn’t sound cruel or cheap. She just stared at Catra for a long while, her heartbeat impossibly slow as the air churned around them both. Eventually, Catra glanced back at her. She looked away for a second, then back to Adora, then off into the distance, and then back at Adora again. Finally, Catra’s eyes narrowed and she creased her brow.

“Ugh, why? You just won’t leave me alone, will you?”

Adora walked toward her. 

“Catra, listen. I know this is a dream, okay, and you won’t really hear this even if I say it but I can’t just  _ not _ say it.”

“Yeah,” Catra snapped, “You can, it’s easy, if you would ever shut up.”

“Catra, I don’t want to fight you,” Adora said, her words clumsy and blunt, “I never did, and I never meant to hurt you. I’m sorry I never noticed how often you covered for me and protected me from Shadow Weaver, but I never used you or–”

Catra jumped up and stormed across the clearing, her claws drawn and her hands were shaking.

“Stop. Just stop, okay? What’s it going to take for you to go away!? Why do you keep showing up whenever I go to sleep and making me want to forgive you!?” Catra’s voice cracked and she clenched her fists. “You’re never going to come back, and I’m not giving up everything I fought for just to join your princess party, so why are you still here!?”

Pain like thunder sank through Adora’s stomach and her chest ached. She honestly couldn’t understand why, since she knew everything Catra said was probably true, but even so… even so, it hurt more than she ever thought it would. She felt like someone had just slammed a boulder against her gut.

_ Why can’t I even convince the Catra in my dreams? They’re my dreams, right!? If I can’t even do this, how am I ever going to convince her to join us for real. Ugh, this doesn't make any sense! _

Catra paced back to the far side of the clearing and leaned back against a rock pillar that jutted up from the ground. At a loss, Adora thought for a moment longer, made absolutely no progress, and finally took a break to stretch her arms out over her head. The moment she raised one hand, she flinched from the pain of the scratches on her back. Without thinking, she lowered her hand to touch her wounds and when she did, Catra noticed.

“Heh,” Catra chuckled and smirked at Adora, watching her from the corner of her eye, “Still walking around with my claw marks on you?”

Adora glared back and her tightened her jaw. “Yeah, and they hurt like hell!”

Catra hummed and her tail started flicking back and forth. “So then why do you keep stretching like that?” She sounded incredibly smug and pleased with herself, “You did that last time too–Guess you just like having a reminder of what I did to you last time we met.”

Adora exhaled sharply and her brow creased hard. With her eyes fixed on Catra, she closed the distance between them.

“Hey, I told you to stay over there!” Catra hopped back, but Adora didn’t stop. She corner Catra between a boulder and a mess of tangled vines, and even though Catra could’ve easily escaped, she just stood there looking petulant and impatient. 

“Fine,” Catra grumbled, “You’re a dream after all. It doesn’t matter what I say, does it?”

“It does matter!” Adora’s voice rose and hit a desperate tone, “I just don’t know what to do. I can’t let the horde destroy any more of Etheria, but I don’t want it to destroy you either!”

Catra hissed and grabbed Adora’s collar in her fist. 

“It’s not destroying me! I survived! I’m not the weak little kid who was always afraid of Shadow Weaver anymore and I don’t need you to rescue me! You’re the one who ran from her, but I beat her, and soon I’ll be the one at the top of the horde.” She smirked and sneered. “Destroy me? Adora, I’ve never been stronger.”

“But then what?” Adora grabbed Catra’s shirt and nearly slammed their foreheads together. “What happens after you take over? Do you just keep destroying villages and attacking runestones because Hordak said so!?”

“Shut up!” Catra pushed Adora back, but with far less force than Adora expected, “You don’t get to lecture me about my life since you’re the one who ran out of it!”

“I didn’t run from you though! I ran from the horde…” Adora said, her voice low and brittle, “and from Shadow Weaver and Hordak, but Catra, I never wanted to run from you.”

“You replaced me!” 

“No one replaced you!” Adora felt her voice catch in her throat and she strained to get the words out, “No one is ever going to be the girl I grew up with, the one I ran through the halls with, hiding from Shadow Weaver and making fun of Octavia and stealing skiffs to go cruising at night… No one is ever going to be the girl who was there for me even when I didn’t realize I was in trouble. I know this is a dream and you’re not the real Catra right now so maybe this doesn’t mean anything, but if I saw you today, I’d say the exact same thing.

Silence settled in between them. Adora met Catra’s gaze and the air spiraled around them in tiny cyclones of dark mist. Catra’s eyes were wide and her pupils razor thin. Her jaw hung open, her tail was curled around her waist, and her fingers twitched as if she wanted to reach for something nearby. Then she scowled again and looked off into the woods. 

“Catra, I–”

Sparks crashed through the air as Catra growled and slammed her hand against the rock at her side, dragging her claws through them and leaving three deep gashes in the stone.

“You still don’t get it, do you, Adora!? Why do I even bother?”

“Catra, wait,” Adora took a step forward, but the mist around her thickened until she could barely see her own hands. “Catra! Catra!”

The mist swirled around Adora’s neck and tightened, blotting out her vision until finally, in a flash of cold, icy sweat, she woke up.


	3. Dream III: Brightmoon Palace

Catra moved through the halls of the Fright Zone’s force captain barracks, her feet falling so heavy they nearly made a sound. Her face was sour and her fists were clenched, and at around every fifth step she paused for a breath and scowled.

As she neared the end of the corridor, a vent on the wall suddenly flew off and Entrapta scurried out into the hall.

“Oh, Hi Catra!”

Catra reeled back and watched wide-eyed as Entrapta waved, set the vent cover back using her hair, opened a nearby door with another part of her hair, and then scurried out of sight again. When she was gone, Catra blinked and shook her head.

“Well, whatever. I’ve got work to–”

“Oh, hey there Catra.”

Scorpia appeared from around the corner up ahead and smiled wide as she waved a claw. “You’re up pretty early today. You wanna join me for morning aerobics? I lead all the cadets in my force through this really great team building exercise on the weekends.”

Catra walked past her without stopping. Scorpia turned and matched her pace, walking alongside her.

“Not now,” Catra said, still staring ahead, “I’ve got work to do.”

Scorpia leaned closer and studied Catra’s face. “You sure? You look kinda beat.”

“Yeah!” Entrapta suddenly appeared from a panel in the ceiling and hopped down to join them. “Catra, you’ve definitely not been getting adequate sleep and your REM cycles seem to be irregular and abbreviated lately. Last night I even heard you screaming at Adora in your sleep while I was moving through the vents that run over your room!”

Catra’s fur puffed up and her face went pale. “You WHAT!?”

“Yeah it was a lot of stuff like ‘ _You still don’t get it, do you, Adora!? Why do I even bother?’_ and _‘You replaced me!’_ and then a really unhealthy sounding pattern of snores and–ah!”

Catra bared her fangs and within an instant, Entrapta was grinning sheepishly and darting away into another nearby door. Once she was gone, Catra smoothed out the scowl on her face and steadied herself.

“Get me someone to seal off those vents by tonight.”

“Oh, sure.” Scorpia said, her voice soft but a bit cautious, “But you know Catra, if you’re having bad dreams maybe we could talk through it. We are super best pals after all, right? Like the other day, me and Entrapta were just talking about how we both had this wild nightmare about a flying horse shooting a crossbow at us? It was pretty cool.”

Catra pulled her lips into a sharp, wry smile. “Thanks, but it’s fine,” She turned back to the end of the hall and started marching again, “The best way to get over our last defeat will be finding a way to destroy Brightmoon and the rebellion forever.”

 

* * *

 

Despite her confidence earlier in the day, Catra felt more distracted than driven as she settled into her room for the night. Being Hordak’s second-in-command came with the benefit of a private room, which often felt like more of a punishment than a reward. As long as she was calling out Adora’s name in her sleep, though, Catra was more than happy to be make sure no one else was around to hear. Just to make certain that no one would hear her while she was dreaming, she climbed up to the vents on either side of her bed; Once Catra saw that they had been sealed at both ends, she dropped to the floor and flopped back onto her bed.

_I hate this so much._

She grimaced and rolled onto her side, grabbing a pillow and holding it to her chest as she curled herself up and tried to force herself to sleep. It didn’t work, not for a long while. Catra tried to think of nothing but the horde’s invasion plans and training patterns and preparations for their next attack. That didn’t work very well, either. Eventually, in between disjointed thoughts of tank deployments and the way Adora’s one eyebrow rose up when she grinned, Catra lost consciousness and finally fell asleep.

Catra opened her eyes the very next moment. A rush of warmth radiated against her back and her tail slid across something smooth and firm. The bed underneath her was softer than her own and the air was crisp and bright, full of the trace of magic and the light of the moonstone. Even without looking around, she knew she was in Brightmoon… and she was curled up in the curve of Adora’s back as she slept. Catra’s heart nearly stopped.

“What!?”

Catra sat upright and backed away to the far end of the bed. She watched as Adora stirred, her eyes fixed on the slow rise and fall of her chest as she breathed and the mess of her hair spilled across her pillow. Adora grunted drowsily and slowly opened her eyes, yawning as she sat up and squinted in the dark.

“Nnngh… what is–Catra!”

Adora’s eyes widened and she leaned closer to Catra. She put a hand around Catra’s wrist, gently, and she smiled, fondly, and then all at once she blinked and backed away to the far end of the bed.

“Wait, Catra, what are you doing here? How did you even get past the whispering woods?”

Catra sneered. “I don’t know! I don’t even know where we are!”

“Don’t play dumb.” Adora glared at her. “This is Brightmoon palace, what are you doing in–oh, wait… no, this is another dream, isn’t it?”

Adora glanced at her side and Catra followed her eyes to the sword of protection leaning against her bed. The blade was made of cotton candy and the hilt was a soft, plush kitten paw with pink toes. Catra almost laughed, but she didn’t allow herself.

“Oh, very clever,” She gave Adora a slow, silent clap, “I don’t know why I even bother trying against such a genius strategist.”

Adora’s brow creased. “Listen, i’m just really tired and stressed about a lot of things lately. Mostly all about you.”

Catra chuckled and smirked. “The feeling’s mutual. So, this is where they got you set up?”

Catra scanned the room and studied their surroundings. There were silk curtains draped over the walls, pillows stacked up in corners for no apparent reason, way too many open windows, and also why did she hear a waterfall nearby? She opened her mouth to tease Adora again, but then she caught herself and turned away.

_No, this is just what I’m imagining Adora’s room would look like. Keep it together. None of this is real and I can’t stay here._

“It’s not exactly– I mean, it’s sort of like this, but it’s different,” Adora looked around quickly, “The ceilings are a lot higher in the real thing, and there aren’t this many windows or pillows all over… no wait, I think there are that many pillows.” She squinted as if she was trying to remember and then she shook her head out.

“Anyway, this is the third night in a row, isn’t it? I guess… I can’t stop dreaming about you, for some reason.”

Catra’s heart started to pound against her ribs.

“The third night? Just the third night for you!? Do you realize how long you’ve been taunting me in my sleep!? I’m–”

_Wait what am I even saying, SHE’S A DREAM SHE’S NOT REAL! Ugh._

Catra glared back at Adora, expecting to find her glowering or pleading or some other combination of expressions that would make Catra feel awful, but instead she just found Adora looking at her absently. A slight, bittersweet smile crossed Adora’s face and she seemed to relax.

“Honestly, I wish I could remember my dreams every night like this.” Adora laughed a moment, her expression and voice a bit sour, “It’s better than only getting to see you on the battlefield.”

Something caught in Catra’s throat and she felt a flash of heat running through her chest. Her pulse was getting quicker every time she looked back at Adora and talking to her wasn’t slowing it down. Just being in the same room was wearing down her nerves.

“Yeah, well,” Catra hopped off the bed and shrugged as she walked toward the door, “I’ve had more than enough of this so I’m just gonna hop to a different part of this dream. See ya, Adora.”

_Probably won’t get any good information just from wandering around in a dream but it’s better than staying in there._

“Wait, Catra!”

Adora called after her, but Catra was already at the door. When she grabbed the handle and pulled, the door only budged an inch and then stuck. Grumbling, Catra yanked on the door with both hands and it flew open, revealing a screaming mass of shivering darkness on the other side. The air in the doorway crackled like fire and when Catra reached out to touch the murky black, her hand felt like it was suddenly both frozen solid and burning from the sting of a thousand needles. She leapt back and fell against Adora’s chest as Adora caught Catra by the shoulders. Catra hesitated for a moment, not from the shock or the pain, but because she felt suddenly safe and she hated it.

“Tch.” Catra scoffed at the door and rolled her shoulder out of Adora’s grip. “I can’t even get away from you here, can I?”

Before Adora could say anything else, Catra turned back and headed for the bed, flopping down on her back with her hands laced behind her head. She waited for Adora to follow after her again, but Adora didn’t move. After a moment, Catra heard her close the door and wander toward the center of the room.

“Catra, since this is a dream…”

 _Ugh, I knew this was coming…_ Catra bit her lip and her face hardened. She kept her eyes fixed on the ceiling, but through the corner of her eye she could just barely see Adora moving closer.

“Since none of this is really real and you’re not really here in my room,” Adora went on, slowly grasping each word as she formed it, “Then, what if there weren’t a horde or a rebellion–”

“Oh no,” Catra leaned up and glowered at her, “You are _not_ doing that to me again. I’m not even going to _think_ about that. Just give up, Adora.” Catra sighed. “It’ll be easier for both of us.”

Adora sounded more annoyed than anything. “What are you talking about? I’ve never said anything like that before. _You_ just don’t want to listen!”

“Ugh!” Catra slammed her head back against Adora’s pillow, “I hate dreams!”

“Okay, Listen!” Adora suddenly closed the distance and sat down on the bed, leaning over Catra with both hands pressed into the mattress just around her shoulders. “Catra, you’re still important to me and I’ll fight you every day if I have to, but I don’t want to! And we don’t have to!”

Catra swatted Adora’s arms away and flashed her fangs. “I told you, I’m not throwing everything away just to run back and be one of your little princesses who waits around until you call on them. You want me to go from being your second to being your seventeenth!? Ha!”

“No!” Adora shouted so loud Catra felt the fur on her neck prickling. There was something desperate in her eyes and fragile in her voice and Catra hated how much that alone could move her.

“I want you to be my friend!” Adora’s voice lowered and she sounded so weary and worn, “You’ve never been second to anyone. You were the first friend I ever had, and the closest thing to family I’ve ever had! That’s why I can’t stand to see you fighting for the horde and serving under Hordak!”

Fire welled up in Catra’s veins. Her face twisted up into a furious scowl and before she even realized what she was doing, she grabbed Adora by the arms and shoved her back against the wall at the foot of the bed.

“Friend!?” Catra’s eyes were thin as needles and her face was so close to Adora’s she could see her own reflection in Adora’s eyes. “Listen up Adora, I’m not your friend and I’m definitely not your sister, and I don’t want to be either so just _shut up_ already!”

As they stared at one another, time seemed to slow to a crawl. Catra could barely breathe or form a single thought until she saw the trace of a grin tugging at Adora’s lips.

“You say you don’t want to be my friend but your tail’s flipping up again~ You always do that when you’re happy or excited about something.”

“Shut up.”

“Come on,” Adora teased, “Admit it, you really do like me, don’t you?”

“No, you idiot!” Catra felt her grip weaken, “I don’t want to be your ‘Friend’! I LOVE YOU!”

“Wha…”

The smug grin on Adora’s face vanished and her shoulders went limp in Catra’s grip. She leaned back against the wall and Catra let go of her, and for a moment all Adora did was stare. A dull ache spread through Catra’s chest and she sat back on her heels, looking through the open window at the flat, painted outlines of Brightmoon below. She wanted to wake up, not that it would help. She could already tell that Adora knew exactly what she meant. She had to; after all, the desperate crack in Catra’s voice, the quiver of her lips, the look in her eyes, and even the flick of her tail all gave her away. Even someone as oblivious as Adora had to realize after all of that.

 _It’s always like this, isn’t it?_ Catra stole a glance back at Adora, but she couldn’t meet her gaze for more than a second. _She always realizes after I say it, like it never even occurred to her before–Like she never even thought about it once in all our lives._

Catra huffed and threw herself at the open window, which turned out to be as solid as plate glass. She slashed the air with her claws and felt them skid off of something harder than steel.

“Ugh! How do I make this stupid dream end!”

Adora didn’t respond, at least not to Catra’s yelling. She was still staring, still wide-eyed and mouth agape, still nearly dumbstruck.

“Love… like, love?” Adora blinked. “You mean…”

Catra snorted and leaned back against Adora’s pillow, propping herself up and lounging against the wall.

“I just…” Adora raised her hand to reach out, but then she pulled it back to her side. “Wait, I–”

 _Ha. This is new._ Catra smiled dryly to herself. _Usually by this point in the dream, Adora’s trying to confess her undying affection to me and say that she always loved me all along, as if that’s not the most infuriating thing ever. Damn, the Adora in my dream is even worse than the real one._

“Wait, wait, Catra,” Adora finally found her voice, “You mean… I–I didn’t realize…”

“Of course you didn’t!” Catra cackled bitterly, “You never realize. You’ve spent all this time running around talking about your new best friends in the rebellion after you left me behind, and then you say you still want to be my best friend too, but Adora,”

Catra leaned up quickly, her mouth beside Adora’s ear so close that her lips brushed Adora’s hair as she whispered,

“I don’t want to be just your best friend, and it doesn’t matter if I go to Brightmoon or if you come back to the horde; you’re never going to realize that.”

Catra flopped back against the bed and sighed. She avoided making eye contact with Adora and wrapped her tail around her leg to keep it from moving, and then she just let out a deep, heavy breath as she sank into the mattress.

 _At least this is better than most nights._ Catra thought, _By this point she’s usually acting all prim and apologetic and asking to kiss me and making everything a mess right before I wake up. Her being shocked and clueless like she always is? That at least I can deal with._

Catra fidgeted. She could still see Adora sitting up across from her, biting her lip and glancing aside as she lost herself in thought. Catra felt her tail twitching. Her heart was racing.

_Damn it, I really do like the dreams where she wants to kiss me though. It’s not real. It’s not real and I know it’s not real and it’s the stupidest thing ever! I shouldn’t care about any of this, or about her and her frustrating, infuriating–_

“Catra, I–” Adora choked out a syllable and her voice caught in her throat. Catra looked up and met her eyes, which was a mistake since the moment she met Adora’s gaze, every thought left her mind.

“I really care a lot about you too,” Adora’s voice was strained and she struggled to hold each word. Catra watched her for a moment, her skin hot and her fur ruffled, but then she scoffed again.

“Like you really think that matters at this point,” Catra said. Adora scowled at her.

“Listen, I’m trying to figure all of this out! I don’t understand anything! We’re in a dream right now and there’s a million princesses in the palace and you _just_ attacked a few days ago and nothing makes any sense!”

“Of course it doesn’t!” Catra rolled her eyes, “This is a dream and you aren’t real and when I wake up I’ll still be Hordak’s second-in-command and you’ll still be She-Ra. We’ll still keep fighting ‘til you all finally give up, or ‘til one of us dies. That’s why all of this is pointless.”

“...Okay,” Adora drew a steady breath, “then we can just do whatever we want, right?”

“Yeah, except leave.” Catra grumbled.

Adora nodded firmly. “Ok. Then since this might be my only chance to see you again… I want to know.”

Suddenly, Catra felt the mattress shift and she looked up to find Adora moving closer, leaning toward her and bringing her face hazardously near to Catra’s own.

“I don’t think I want to be your best friend either, Catra… so I want to know.”

Catra’s eyes went wide. “Wha– you _think_!?”

“I don’t know!” Adora threw her hands up, “I didn’t even know what parties were until I left the fright zone! I didn’t even know people got married! I still don’t understand a lot because we just never talked about it and I know there might not be any chance that you’ll ever leave the horde, but if that’s true then…” Adora hesitated, her face flushed pink and her ears burning. “I want to know if what we’re both feeling is the same.”

Catra’s mind went blank for a moment. Her tail started whipping back and forth involuntarily and she reached forward to hold Adora’s arms as Adora cupped Catra’s elbows with her hands. Before Catra could convince herself to stop, she leaned in close until her nose brushed against the tip of Adora’s cheek.

Adora’s face was twisted up awkwardly and she looked more nervous than she had the first time they stole a skiff. She swallowed hard and her hands tensed up.

“...I wanna kiss you.”

 _Don’t do it, don’t let her do this, don’t kiss her, Catra don’t do it!_ Catra was screaming inside her own head, but her hands were slipping further up Adora’s arm to steady them both. _Don’t let her kiss you, don’t close your eyes, don’t close your eyes, don’t close your eyes, if you close your eyes she’s gonna do it!_

But Catra was tired. She was so tired of fighting against her own thoughts and dreams and the memories of Adora she carried around with her. She looked up at Adora once with a sharp grin, and then Catra closed her eyes.

Adora’s lips were warm and her approach was clumsy. She kissed Catra off-center once and then again with better aim, but Catra couldn’t care less how sloppy they were in that moment. She leaned into every motion and Adora leaned back; as Adora wrapped her hands around Catra’s back, Catra grabbed the back of Adora’s hair and pulled her in tight. Even when they broke away to catch their breath, Catra wouldn’t let Adora move back more than an inch. She wanted to feel the heat from her skin every second. When Adora kissed her again, Catra wrapped one arm around Adora’s waist and the two of them toppled off balance as Adora fell onto her back. They barely stopped for an instant.

In between the eager, urgent, almost ecstatic kisses Adora laid across Catra’s face, Catra began to wonder… if this had happened back when they were together in the Fright Zone as cadets, how would things be different? Could it have happened? Would it ever have happened? Probably not, Catra thought. If it had, would Adora have stayed? Again, probably no.

 _Nothing in this dream can change anything, so… fine, why not?_ Catra pressed Adora down against the mattress and kissed the side of her neck, her eyes still closed and her tail now coiling around Adora’s calf. _None of this will happen when we wake up. We’ll never be in Adora’s bedroom making out on her bed and holding each other like this. So why not? It’s just a dream, right?_ Catra raised her head again and met Adora’s lips, kissing her deep and brushing a hand along the line of her jaw. Adora whispered teasing things to her and she might have laughed, but Catra couldn’t concentrate on anything but the feeling of Adora’s skin, the pressure of Adora’s hands against her back, the smell of having Adora nearby her again… it was all a dream and Catra was fine with that. She was really fine with it. So then why did she suddenly hate the idea of waking up so much?

Adora sat upright suddenly and leaned down to kiss Catra once more before pulling away. As she panted and caught her breath, she moved back just out of reach.

“Catra, listen,” Adora pressed her fingers into Catra’s palms, “I’m not going to give up on you.”

“Ha,” Catra laughed softly, “Are you just saying that because you like having my tongue in your mouth?”

Catra smirked and reached up to brush her thumb across Adora’s cheek, but when she stretched her hand out, Adora wasn’t there. She waved her hand around frantically but she could only feel the air. When she opened her eyes to search the room, she found herself back in her quarters in the Fright Zone, sitting upright in her bed and breathing heavily.

For a brief moment, Catra clenched her fist so hard her hand shook. Then, with an exhausted groan, she fell back against her cot and stared up at the ceiling until she fell asleep again.

 

* * *

 

“Catra!”

Adora shot up out of bed so quickly she rolled over the edge and fell onto the floor in a tangle of blankets. She landed on her hands and knees with a thud and as she fought against the mess of her sheets, she heard a quiet, happy giggle across the room.

“She-Ra, do you need assistance?”

Adora pulled her head free from the blanket and looked up to find Queen Nyxia standing nearby and offering her a hand. Still feeling dazed, Adora took her hand and thanked her. Across the room, she could see Queen Asteria holding Princess Somna and shaking a small rattle for her.

“Sorry if I startled you,” Adora said, gathering her bedding up and laying it out across her bed, “I hope I didn’t wake the princess.”

“No,” Nyxia said, smiling slightly, “She wakes up at around this time to eat every morning so we were already up. I hope she didn’t wake you."

“Oh, no,” Adora shook her head out and squinted to push the sleep from her eyes, “I just had a really weird dream that ended suddenly, that’s all.”

Both of the Queens stopped and turned to Adora, staring intently.

“Have they been particularly vivid?” Nyxia asked, “How long has this been happening?”

“Huh?” Adora stopped trying to straighten out her blankets and thought for a moment. “They’ve been really vivid, but it’s just been the past couple of nights so it’s not a big deal.”

“I am so, so sorry!” Nyxia and Asteria both bowed their heads.

“She-Ra, we apologize,” Asteria said, handing the small crystal rattle over to Somna, “Your dreams may be the result of Princess Somna’s power.”

It took more than a moment for Adora to register what was happening. On top of it being the first thing in the morning and her head still feeling hazy from waking up so abruptly, she was still thinking about the fact that just moments ago, she was pretty sure she had her lips on Catra’s neck… along with most every part of her face. All Adora could manage was a half-distracted glance as she said,

“Wait, what’s her power?”

Nyxia raised her head and explained.

“Somna has the power to link the dreams of people nearby with those who are dear to them. It is not the most useful power for a rebellion, I know, but we want to help build a world where our daughter can grow up in peace… I apologize if we have caused you any distress, She-Ra.”

“No, no!” Adora waved her hands in front of her, “It’s alright, really. Um, does she do that every night?”

“No,” Nyxia said, “But she’s still young and she hasn’t grown accustomed to using her abilities yet. My wife and I often end up in one another’s dreams. I admit it can be a bit startling at times.”

“That… actually sounds really nice.” A faint smile crept across Adora’s face and she glanced over at Princess Somna. The princess looked back at her, the tiny pink tuft of hair bobbing on her head as she giggled and clapped the rattle together in her hands, and somehow, Adora felt a little more at ease.

“Well, since I’m up,” Adora said, a bit bitterly, “I might as well get started with morning practice before everyone else gets up. Take care!”

Nyxia, Asteria, and Somna all waved at Adora as she gathered up the sword of protection, left the room, and headed for the courtyard. The moment she left the room, she leaned back against the door and sighed.

 _That… couldn’t have really happened, right?_ Adora placed a hand on her chest and her heart was pounding. _I mean Nyxia said Somna’s power only worked on people nearby, so there’s no way it would actually work on both me and Catra all the way out in the Fright Zone… right? That couldn’t really be the real Catra in my dreams…_

Adora shook her head to clear her thoughts.

_Ok, wondering about this isn’t helping and, either way, there’s no way to know for certain… I guess, unless I ask Catra directly, but what would that even look like? ‘Oh hey Catra, I know you’re trying to destroy another runestone now but did you have a few dreams about me a last week where we made out in my room in Brightmoon palace? Just wondering.’_

Adora sighed again, shaking her head slowly as she gathered herself.

“Okay. Training time. We’ll worry about everything else later.”

Nodding to herself, Adora reached back and gathered her hair up, sweeping it off of her neck and looping it through a tie until she had it all secured in her usual ponytail. As she let her hand drop, her hand brushed against her neck and she felt a slight warmth there. In the smooth walls of the palace corridor, Adora could see her reflection and when she moved her hand away from her neck, she saw a pair of bright red marks under her jaw, right where Catra had kissed her in her dream.

In _their_ dream.

 

Something jagged caught in Adora’s throat and something uneven lodged in her chest. She felt the start of a tear form in her eye that she couldn’t completely explain. The doors at the far end of the hall swung open and before anyone else saw her, Adora pulled her hair tie out and hurried to the courtyard to start training.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for reading! Catradora has pretty much consumed my every waking thought since I watched She-Ra last week, so I hope you enjoyed this (though it is, admittedly, 90% pain)


	4. Still Within Her Grasp - Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh hey remember how I said I wouldn't add any other chapters to this until maybe after Season 2? Well.
> 
> Anyhow, I had this idea for just a single chapter but I decided to split it up into two parts, which should end up being about 4k total, just as a one-shot sort of thing that will take place somewhere between episodes 6 and 7 of S2? Or maybe during episode 7? Anyhow, it takes place during the time when Catra is frantically searching for Shadow Weaver, but before she admits to Scorpia that Shadow Weaver has escaped. Anyway, please enjoy!

The heavy cadence of boots against metal echoed through the halls of a Fright Zone tower. Panting and nearly losing his balance with every step, Kyle hurtled blindly around corners as Rogelio kept pace close behind. In the low, empty passageways that wound through the tower, their footsteps rang out like a dull, frightened pulse. At the end of the hall, Kyle’s heel caught on an uneven step and he toppled forward, his arms flailing as he fell. Rogelio reached for his collar and missed, but Kyle didn’t hit the floor; His forehead fell flat against Catra’s shoulder and a moment later, her fist slammed him back up and against the wall. She hissed, then slowly drew her hands back.

“Watch it!” Catra glared at Kyle, then aside at Rogelio who immediately stood at attention. 

“F-force captain!” Kyle backed away and joined Rogelio. “Sorry, I didn’t-” 

Catra glowered and Kyle’s voice caught in his throat. The Force Captain’s patience had already withered and gone. “If you’re running fast enough to fall on your face, you better have something to report. 

“Y-Yes!” Kyle swallowed a lump in his throat and took a breath. “You told us to look for anything suspicious and so we were looking into suspicious things, which is a lot of things since we’re-”

Catra grabbed his collar and lifted Kyle onto his toes. 

“Get to the point.” 

“Right!” Kyle’s voice cracked. “There’s a - a shipment of food and supplies that went missing from a warehouse near the border with the whispering woods!”

“And…?” Catra glared, and waited. Kyle’s eyes darted from side to side.

“T-that’s all, I don’t know where they went and no one has a record of them being requisitioned…”

“Then go find out where they went!” Catra shoved Kyle away and released him, “Now.”

Rogelio put a hand on Kyle’s shoulder and they both nodded quickly before running past Catra, down the halls and toward the whispering woods. As the sound of their footsteps faded in the air, Catra raked the wall with her claws. Her hands were shaking, as much from her total lack of sleep over the past two nights as the adrenalin that kept her moving. There were thousands of chambers and corridors hidden across the Fright Zone - Catra had searched them all. There were hundreds of files scattered across the floor in Catra’s room, all records left behind by Shadow Weaver when Hordak had her imprisoned - Catra had read them all, twice. Even after two days of searching without rest, she still had no idea where Shadow Weaver could be. 

The sting of sleep crept into Catra’s eyes and she squinted, shaking her head out to chase away her drowsiness. She turned to march back to her quarters and her face smacked right into the center of Scorpia’s chest. 

“Oh, hey there Catra!” Scorpia smiled and steadied Catra with a claw. “Sorry, didn’t mean to walk right into you like that. You okay?”

Catra blinked. Her vision was a bit hazy and her head was light. 

“I’m fine.” Catra slipped around Scorpia and continued down the hall. Scorpia followed after. 

“Ahaha, you know, you say that but, uh,” Scorpia forced a laugh and an awkward smile, “You look kinda like you haven’t slept in a week and for a while I thought you were purring but now I’m thinking that might just be your stomach because I haven’t seen you eat anything either, so -” 

“I said I’m fine!” Catra glanced back and scowled. “Now unless you have something to report, I’ve got work to do.”

“Right, yes,” Scorpia smiled weakly, “I did though, remember? Just a few minutes ago you passed by and I told you I put all those files you asked for in your room?”

Catra didn’t remember. She barely even remembered seeing Scorpia at all when she marched down the hall. She didn’t even remember why she was marching in that direction to begin with, but she wasn’t about to admit any of that. 

Catra sighed. “Anything  _ else _ to report?” 

Scorpia smiled. “Nope! Hey, you want some help looking through those? That was a pretty hefty stack and I can read alongside you if you want.”

“Thanks,” Catra turned and waved Scorpia off, “but I can handle that myself. Just keep looking for anything out of place or suspicious and tell me the moment you find something, got it?”

“Right, you got it Catra,” Scorpia saluted with one claw, “Oh, and I left a cookie on the counter there - gotta keep the blood sugar up!”

Catra’s ear twitched as she walked away. After two steps, she hesitated. Her muscles tensed and she stifled the urge to look back and tell Scorpia to come along and help her, and after that moment had passed, she hurried back to her room.

 

The latest heap of files was there waiting for her, scattered across her bed with a single, tiny cookie resting on top. Catra tossed the cookie into her mouth and chewed like it was a painful chore. Her hand wandered over a folder as she slumped over onto the bed, grabbing a stack of papers straining her eyes to read each line. Mining from a town the Horde conquered months ago. Useless. A catalog of the rations delivered to an outpost that’s been under Alliance control since the battle of Brightmoon. Useless. Every report was irrelevant and every page that Catra turned made her chest tighten. She read the next file, then wrinkled her face up and read it again. The words didn’t make sense. The lines on the page were blurred. Before Catra could stop herself, she nodded off and fell into a steep, heavy sleep.

 

* * *

 

“Catra!  _ Catra _ !” 

A muffled voice screamed on the other side of the dark. Catra’s eyes were open now, but her vision was filled with something solid and dark, like a metal blindfold wrapped around her skull. The voice called her name again and Catra tried to swipe at it with her claws, but her hands wouldn’t move. Something was draped across her body, wrapped around every limb dense as steel and weighing her down. Two arms pressed into her back and pulled her up, nearly crushing her against the weight bearing down on her chest as she fought and snarled and failed to move an inch. 

“Catra, hold on!” 

She was rising, slowly. Something grasped at her skin and tugged at her fur, like metal covered in tar slowly peeling away. The weight around her eyes suddenly fell away with a snap and she could see the sun behind a thick cloud of dust and ash. She fought again and pulled one hand loose, flailing and clawing at the dense, metallic sludge that covered her skin. When she finally wrenched her shoulder free and reached up in search of something to grab as an anchor, she saw the thing that was pulling against her skin - black, otherworldly hands clutching and scraping and dragging against her, reaching up to cover her free hand, wrapping around her throat until she could barely breathe. 

She’d seen something like that before, each time Shadow Weaver decided to hurt her. Her body tensed again and she fought against the shadows covering her arm. With a snap, a shadow fell away and her claws lashed out, landing against something soft and sinking into it. 

“Ow! Catra, stop! I’m trying to help! Just…hold on… a second!”

Catra felt her body lurch upwards and a dozen shadowy fingers lost their grip on her fur. Steadily, the feeling was returning to her limbs and soon she could smell the air around her, feel the two hands clutching her back and lifting her out of the sludge, and above her she could finally see Adora, carrying her in her arms. 

“Catra!” Adora’s voice finally rang clear in Catra’s ears and Catra could see the relief on Adora’s face. It wasn’t joy that Catra saw in her eyes - not surprising, all things considered - but there was something desperate and reaching there that Catra couldn’t stand. She looked away as Adora carried her further away from the shadows.

“You idiot.” Catra went limp and let herself fall against Adora’s chest. “You should’ve just dropped me.”


	5. Still Within hHer Grasp - Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part 2 of my post Season 2 update to this fic. Thank you for reading and please enjoy!

“You idiot.” Catra went limp and let herself fall against Adora’s chest. “You should’ve just dropped me.”

 

Adora didn’t answer her - she was breathing heavily and wincing as she dragged herself and Catra out of the clinging shadows. Four lines of blood dripped down Adora’s shoulder from the spot where Catra’s claws had pierced her skin and lines of sweat were streaked across her face. Catra could feel Adora’s pulse through her skin and it was racing. Adora was distracted and nearly worn out, and the shadows had almost completely lost their grip on Catra’s feet… it was the perfect opportunity to leap away and escape, or play dead so that Adora would panic, or maybe even to reach up and wrap her hands around Adora’s neck. 

She almost did. 

Adora’s sudden appearance, though, and the fact that they were both suddenly on a strange, crystalline desert island surrounded by a sea of shadow-arms made it easier for Catra to realize that this was a dream, and as far as she could tell nothing there was real. Not even Adora. 

Knowing that didn’t exactly set her at ease, considering that her last dream about Adora had ended with her tongue down Adora’s throat. That was nothing new - Catra could remember at least a dozen dreams where she kissed Adora goin all the way back to when they were still sharing the same bed in the fright zone barracks. It was normal, irritating and aggravating, but normal… but not since Adora left. Not since she became She-ra, and part of the princess alliance, and an enemy…

Catra let Adora carry her a few steps further before slipped down and rolled out of her arms, landing with a thud against the dirt. Just as she planned, the moment Catra hit the ground she could hear Adora kneeling down and calling her name.

“Catra, are you okay!? Catra!”

Adora put a hand on Catra’s shoulder and rolled her over onto her back, just as Catra smirked and looped her hands around Adora’s neck to pull her closer.

“Hey Adora. Your grip’s really sloppy, no wonder you can never catch up to me.”

Adora’s lips curled into a lopsided smirk. “I can never catch you because the horde’s always running away.”

“Yeah,” Catra said, “And you always follow us right into every trap like a big dumb puppy.”

Their faces were close - close enough for Catra to see every line in Adora’s furrowed brow and all the messy, twisted up frustration on her face. Catra stared for a moment as Adora watched her silently, almost as if she were expecting something. Still smug and smirking, Catra raised her head to Adora’s ear and let her lips brush Adora’s cheek along the way.

“Waiting for a ‘thank you’, Adora?”

Adora grimaced and jerked herself away. “I don’t know why I bothered.”

Catra grinned. “I told you, you shouldn’t have. You never did listen to me when it mattered, though.”

“You’re the one who won’t listen!” Adora stood up and brushed the cat hair off of her jacket and sighed. Her shoulders sank and her expression was almost pained.

“Why are you like this?” Adora kept looking away, folding her arms across her stomach. 

“Why?” Catra laughed, “Do you think I wanted - wait, no. Nevermind.” Catra sighed herself, lacing her fingers back behind her head and leaning back against the cracked, dusty earth. “This is just another dream so have fun yelling at the dirt. I’m going back to sleep.”

Adora opened her mouth to speak and paused. She blinked and her face wrinkled up pensively. “But we’re already asleep, Catra that doesn’t make any sense.”

“You know what I mean!” Catra huffed. “I’m getting out of this stupid dream because none of it’s real and all these ever do is tire me out.”

“Catra, wait,” Adora walked over and stood beside her, “This  _ is _ a dream but it’s also real. I mean, I’m real, and you’re really here in my dream. Your dream… ours, something! I don’t know.”

Catra rolled away and snorted. “Okay, going to sleep now! See ya, Adora!”

“Catra, listen!”

Catra rolled over and swiped a claw at the air. “Will you shut up!? I’m so sick of you always -” 

Catra’s eyes went wide and a cold shock spread through her body. When she leaned up, she saw the writhing sea of black, shadowy hands surrounding them again and she choked on the dryness in the air.

_ Those hands… it can’t be a coincidence that they look like Shadow Weaver’s magic. Is she here? Is she doing this!? _

Catra bolted up and sprang to her feet, claws out as she scanned every scrap of dirt and dust around her. They were on a small island covered in pale red dust with huge jagged stones jutting up from the ground, and all around them for as far as Catra could see the world was black. Adora said something that Catra didn’t pay any mind. Adora reached out to touch her shoulder Catra swatted her hand away.

“Stay back!” Catra hissed at her and then turned to the sea of shadowy arms churning around her. 

“I know you’re here!” She screamed, “Stop hiding from me Shadow Weaver! Listen, if you come back now Hordak will give you another chance! Come on, where  _ are _ you!?”

Adora ran around to face her. “Catra what do you mean? Shadow Weaver escaped!?” 

“Shut up!” Catra pushed Adora aside and lunged at the nearest rock, crumbling it into a fine powder that settled like sand. She lashed out at the next rock and then another, but everything around her broke apart into dust. There were no illusions left there to trick her. Shadow Weaver wasn’t disguised as a boulder and waiting to strike. She was nowhere, but her magic was there all around them… wasn’t it? She had to be watching Catra from somewhere, laughing, planning something that would hurt her, right?

“Come on, Shadow Weaver! You know you can’t beat me! Or did you forget how you ended up in that cell in the first place!?”

“Wait, no… Catra, I don’t think she’s…” Adora’s voice was quiet and she let it die on the wind. Catra’s eyes darted across the horizon and as she paced across the small island, her ears twitched. There was a sound on the wind - a voice? A name? More complete nonsense in the middle of a nightmare? She shifted her ears to catch the noise and from the ground beneath her, she heard a crack.

By the time Catra looked down, the earth had already split open and heavy, black arms erupted from the gash. The shadows flew to her and clutched her ankles, her wrists, her throat - she twisted and thrashed against them but the ground was crumbling beneath her and shadowy hands were swarming through every crack. 

“Catra!” Adora rushed to Catra’s side and grabbed her arm, pulling so hard Catra felt her joints strain and pop. The pain flashed through her shoulder like fire and Catra swung wildly. Her claws caught Adora’s hand and sliced her palm, but even though Adora winced, she didn’t let go.

“Ow! Catra, stop! I’m trying to help!”

“I don’t-” Catra twisted her face and fought against the heavy, leaden shadows wrapping around her, “I don’t want your help, Adora!” 

Adora’s brow creased and she clenched her fists. Then she charged at Catra and tackled her to the ground. The shadows scattered and Catra wheezed.

“Ugh, get off! What are you -”

“Stop being so stubborn!” 

“No!” Catra twisted and put her hands against Adora’s chest to push her back, but Adora already had her arms wrapped around Catra and neither of them could budge. That was when Catra realized that both of her arms were free… the shadows were losing their grip and falling away as Adora held her. A writhing carpet of fingers and knuckles shifted around them, but none of the shadows came close. Catra closed her eyes and groaned.

“Get off of me! Ugh, I can’t deal with fake dream Adora right now, I have to find Shadow Weaver!”

Catra raised her head and slammed it into Adora’s forehead, but Adora didn’t flinch. She pressed her head back down and glared at Catra as she held her in place.

“Catra, this is real! I mean, this isn’t real, it’s a dream, but I’m real so listen to me!”

Catra snarled. “That doesn’t make any sense!”

“I know, but just -”

Catra finally wrestled one hand free and pushed Adora’s face away. As she lifted her arm, however, a pair of black tendrils lashed out and coiled around Catra’s elbow, jerking her back and dragging her down into the crumbling earth. Adora reached out and pulled Catra’s arm back and as she did, the shadows lost their grip and withered. Catra tried to use that moment to squirm free, but Adora caught her and tackled her to the ground again.

“I told you to get off!”

“Will you just listen!?” Adora shouted as she held Catra’s head against her shoulder. Over Adora’s back, Catra could see the sky filling with gangling, spindly fingers that were all twisting toward her, all beckoning and grasping as their joints bent at impossible angles and clawed at the air. They were completed surrounded, but each time the hands approached and touched Adora, they flew back as if they had just touched raw lightning. 

“Listen to me, Catra... “ Adora said, her voice low and heavy, “I don’t know if Shadow Weaver is here or if she’s the one doing this, but even if this is just a nightmare… you protected me when we were kids and she hurt you so much back then, so stop being stubborn and let me do this!”

Catra struggled, but only for a moment. Soon she let herself sink against Adora’s chest, closing her eyes as she grit her teeth.

_ This is why I hate dreams… they always make me want to believe her. And why’s she saying she’ll protect me now!? I’m fine now. I can beat Shadow Weaver by myself… where were you when we were kids and she tried to strangle me for no reason? Why didn’t you do something back then!? Right, because Adora, you never realized… You never realize anything unless someone points it out to you. UGH what am I doing, yelling at fake dream Adora just wears me out… _

Catra rested her cheek against Adora’s shoulder. It was comfortable, safe and nostalgic and swimming in the scent of Adora’s hair just like all those nights back in the Fright Zone barracks when they slept side by side. She hated it, and she hated every night she’d spent sleeping alone since Adora left, and she hated how easily she fell back against her and how much she wanted to relax there with her arms around Adora’s waist… but she was tired. She was so tired, from the search for Shadow Weaver and the fear that everything she did was useless. She wanted to fall asleep next to Adora like that again, back when they could just rest and Catra at least forgot about how worthless she felt for a few moments. Even if this was just a nightmare, though, and even if Shadow Weaver wasn’t using some sort of dream magic as revenge against Catra, Catra couldn’t waste any time here while Shadow Weaver was free. 

“I don’t need you to protect me, Adora,” Catra said at last, though she made no effort to break free, “I just need to wake up.”

“Catra…” Adora pulled back just far enough to look Catra in the eyes and she took a deep breath. 

“Alright, this is going to sound stupid but at least if I’m wrong then this is just a dream and nothing’s real so it’s not like anyone will remember it.”

Catra smirked. “Too late, I already remember how stupid you are every single day.”

Adora glowered and ignored her. 

“This is a dream, but we’re both here - I mean this is both of our dreams and we’re both dreaming it together and - Listen, there’s this baby princess who stayed in the palace a while ago and she like - I don’t know, she connects people’s minds or something while they’re dreaming.”

Catra yawned. “Yeah that sounds like dream nonsense.”

“I’m serious!” Adora frowned for a moment, then her face flushed and she glanced away. “Last time this happened we were both in my room at Brightmoon palace, right? And when I woke up,” Adora’s lips twisted up awkwardly, “Those marks on my neck were still there. Do you understand now?”

Catra stared intently. “Sure thing, dreamboat,” She grinned, “If that’s true then you would’ve brought it up. I would’ve noticed.”

“I was in the middle of battle! Every day! Because  _ you _ kept sending bots into the forest! When was I supposed to stop and say ‘Hey, Catra, this might be weird but did you have a dream about making out with me four nights ago?” 

Catra shrugged. Even if this was a dream, almost nothing else in the world was as fun as teasing Adora. 

“Sorry, this still sounds pretty much like dream nonsense,” Catra said, “I’m pretty sure that’s part of that one old horde story about the headless princess that used to make you scream.”

“That’s-” Adora’s face hardened and scowled. “Okay, you know what? Fine, if you don’t believe me then here.” Adora leaned back and held out her hand. “Go ahead and leave whatever mark you want so you can see that I’m not lying.”

“Wow Adora, if you wanted me to use my claws more you should've just said so~” Catra hummed and pulled her claws free, tapping them across Adora’s skin. “You’re already bleeding and you want me to scratch you again? That’s not a healthy way to fight, you know.”

Catra ran a hand over Adora’s shoulder and Adora blinked.

“Wait, you’re right.” Adora pulled her hand back. “That’ll heal when I turn into She-Ra. Okay, then next time we fight, I’ll cut my hair right after I transform so you know that this is real.”

“Can you even do that?” Catra’s eyes narrowed, “Or are you just that desperate to make sure I remember pressing you up against a wall?”

“No! I mean, I don’t know,” Adora’s lips curled down, “I’ll figure something out, alright!?”

_...You know what, _ Catra thought to herself as she stared up at Adora’s desperate, determined, clueless face,  _ Since we’re here, I might as well. _

Catra traced one claw along Adora’s throat and lifted up her chin, pulling her face down until she was close enough for Catra to lean up and press their lips together. Adora tried to mumble something but her words tangled together on Catra’s tongue. Soon, she ran her hand through Catra’s hair and held the back of her neck up as they kissed. When she finally pulled away, catra laughed bitterly as she settled back and closed her eyes.  _ Sorry Adora. Playing make-believe with you is fun, but none of that makes any difference if I can’t find Shadow Weaver… _

She pressed her lips against Adora’s chin, then her jaw, then the curve of Adora’s neck. Adora held her close and stroked her hair, and soon Catra could barely feel anything at all. As the last sensation of Adora’s lips faded from her skin, the dream dissolved around her and Catra fell back into a light, restless sleep.

 

* * *

 

“Catra!” 

Adora bolted upright in bed, cold sweat damp against her face. Her blankets were crumpled on the floor and her pillow was crushed into a formless lump beside her, but beyond that her room at Brightmoon palace was still in perfect order. Calming herself, Adora pushed her hair back out of her face and gathered her blanket up off the ground.

“Those dreams again…” She stared at her mangled blanket as she held it in her hands, “Why are they still happening even though Somna left the palace weeks ago?” Adora sighed and  touched her arm and shoulder. The wounds were there, just as they had been in her dream, but at least the bleeding had stopped. Her clothes were a complete mess though.

Too exhausted to change, Adora made sure her wounds were wrapped with scrap cloth before she climbed back into bed. “Maybe I really do need to tell someone about this…”

Still feeling the pressure of Catra’s lips on her skin, she buried her face in the pillow and shut her eyes, hoping that she could fall asleep again before daybreak.She wrapped her blanket tightly around her and slowly, quietly drifted off again. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!  
> This is probably all I'm going to add until at least after Season 3 - I do like the idea of the dreams continuing now but I want to wait until we get more content before I try and write anything else for this fic. This chapter, along with the previous one, takes place somewhere between episode 6 and 7 of Season 2, after Shadow Weaver has escaped but before Catra confides in Scorpia about Shadow Weaver's disappearance. 
> 
> I hope you've enjoyed reading so far!

**Author's Note:**

> Somna is derived from Somnus, the Roman name for Hypnos, the personification of sleep. 
> 
> Asteria is the name of a Greek Titan who presided over stars, especially meteor showers and other omens of the night sky. 
> 
> Nyxia is derived from Nyx, the personification of Night (and mother of Hypnos)
> 
> Also Queen Asteria in this fic is a trans woman.


End file.
